Wednesday, January 25, 2006

A business plan [2]

.. and again totally for free!

I promised to give away some business ideas. Here's the next installment.

Idea #2
Observing the landscape

During my working life in several companies I have seen many projects come by. Some of them were huge successes others failed brilliantly.

Finding the opportunity

Successful projects are easy, there is nothing to them. So where is the opportunity?

Well, project that fail offer huge opportunities. At the end of such a project there will always be a evaluation and then someone has to be blamed for the failure. Blaming your own employees is not a very easy thing. You will be destroying careers, but also possibly throwing away experienced and motivated employees. Some of these might even have become friends.

You need some outsider to take the fall: the scapegoat.

Idea #2: blame-the-temp.com
Resources needed

You need a website (yes) and a base of professional scapegoats. These can be hired for selected periods and will be very present during the span of an entire project. The scapegoat will send memos to management with the summed up opinion of a project team. Carefully omitting any team member's name. He will be posing all sorts of questions during meetings. By request he can even ignore any questions or tasks. He can also send totally unrelated and irrelevant advise to management. He will also be very sociable, with good jokes and snappy conversation. His ties will be just too much.

In this way everyone within the organization will know the weird temporary project manager with his strange behavior.

So, when failure for the project is approaching the scapegoat will be very easy to blame. And no employees will have to be blamed, keeping everyone perfectly happy.

And if ever a project should succeed (how improbable it seems) there is a good change that it is late or incomplete so blame the scapegoat. And if ever you should have a perfect project on time within costs and with all deliverables, then we sincerely apologize for the bad performance of the scapegoat.

So, for any type of project or business reorganization with high or low risk: hire a scapegoat.

Good luck

And when you do get filthy rich: please remember where you got the idea from!